Teaching The Lone Wolf Not To Go It Alone

Gary Wojciechowski 
MDI Contributor

Asking for help from the men? Don’t go it alone?

That is a tall order for the “lone wolf,” who runs alone in his own pack.

Asking for help is hard for most in part because we men have a lot of pride. Many of us are lone wolves with a lot of F-U’s thinking we can handle this ourselves. In fact most of us have so much pride that we not only feel we can look after ourselves but also take pride in being generous enough to help others.

Looking back on my life, I grew up on a farm where farmers, too, don’t ask for help that often. They are pretty self-sufficient and take pride in being able to handle anything on their own. However, if a neighbour is stuck, the community pulls together quickly to help out. The man didn’t need to ask for help; we all could see he obviously does need it. And it’s funny sometimes to see six tractors all stuck because one neighbour tried to pull the other out, also getting stuck in the process … one right after the other.

Six stuck tractors – now that is a community embracing the concept of helping thy neighbour.

In this situation, everyone was all eager to help, but sometimes the wisest thing to do is to just wait until things dry up a bit.

In the winter if a truck is stuck in the middle of nowhere, chances are the person could freeze to death. Because of this, anyone driving by will stop and offer a ride. Again no need to ask; the community pulls together, and in short order not only will a ride be offered but a tow and the situation will be handled.

What I see on men’s teams is that sort of back-to-the-roots behaviour. Men may like to be able to handle everything all on their own, but they also know that there is a community around them that will jump in to help out when the going gets tough.

We don’t need to ask if others can see us.

And if or when we do ask for help, others will respond as they are able to.

Why? Because we are a community. We all know that one day we too will likely need help. And these are our men who will be there for us. 

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