After my marriage failed, I was hesitant to start dating again, but eventually, I decided to give it a try. And while I’ve had some great experiences and met some wonderful women, I’ve also had my fair share of disappointments.
Last Valentine’s Day, I put a lot of time and effort into selecting the perfect card for a woman I was dating and really liked. I ordered it off Etsy, and it arrived just in time. It was the perfect card, not too mushy or “hallmark.” It actually held some humor which matched the laughter we shared when we were together for months we were together. But when I gave it to her, she didn’t seem to appreciate it, and I felt embarrassed and hurt. I had an expectation of the outcome, I expected that it would make her happy and that she would appreciate my efforts. She would end our relationship two weeks later. During her “It’s not you it’s me” speech she did mention the card I gave her and how thoughtful it was; she said it made her smile.
Fast forward a year, and I will most likely find myself alone on Valentine’s Day. But this time, I’m OK with it.
No cards to buy.
But don’t feel sorry for me, because I’m not lonely. Rather I’m excited. You see, being alone on Valentine’s Day means no more awkward first dates, no more trying to force chemistry, and no more settling for less than I deserve. It means I’m free to focus on myself and all the things I’ve been putting off, like finally learning how to cook a fancy dinner or figuring out how that damn squirl keeps getting into my basement.
And let’s not forget, being single also means no more overpriced prix-fixe menus or trying to come up with thoughtful gifts that will inevitably be returned or be unappreciated. I don’t have to worry about pleasing anyone else or making sure my schedule aligns with someone else’s. I can do what I want, when I want, without any pressure or expectation. Instead, I’ll be indulging in all the things I love, like going to the gym, practicing archery or finally starting the axe restoration project I decided to take on.
So, this Valentine’s Day, while couples are fighting over reservations and trying to come up with the perfect way to express their love, this single man will be living it up and loving every moment of it.
I’ve decided to take a break from dating and just focus on myself. I’ve realized that being alone comes with a lot of benefits. I’ve also found that being alone has given me the time and space to focus on my own personal growth and development. I’ve been able to take up new hobbies, pursue my interests, and focus on my health and well-being. I’ve realized that the more fulfilled I am as an individual, the more likely I will attract a more suitable partner.
So, while I may not have a significant other to share Valentine’s Day with this year, I’m content in knowing that I’m taking care of myself and working on becoming the best version of myself. And who knows, maybe next Valentine’s Day, I’ll be the one receiving the thoughtful card.
But for now, I’m happy to enjoy the quiet of being alone.