Vidal Budhu
Guest Writer

My name is Vidal Budhu. I have been a member of MDI¹ since April 2024. I enjoy every meeting and the support of the men on my team. The topic of SEX has, unfortunately, caught my attention. This is something I am battling on a regular basis.

I have never had a girlfriend, and therefore have never had an intimate moment with a female. This is causing anxiety, as I am getting older and time is passing me by. I do not want to remain single and unloved for the remainder of my life.

I do not know what it feels like to have an intimate moment with a female. I have resorted to watching porn numerous times, and during those times, I have felt deep regret and remorse for doing so. 

All my life I have felt ugly, unwanted, and unappreciated. This caused me to have insecurities around women and approaching women. Even up to this day, I do not have the full confidence in knowing how to approach women and the right words to say. I am always foreseeing the outcome before it happens. I am definitely not a risk-taker as I fear rejection.

I am not here to complain about my life, or to seek dating advice. I am here to give a quick summary of my current situation and how I am feeling at the moment while I am writing this message.

What I realize in life is that I should never allow insecurities to define me, or to set unrealistic expectations. I, along with every other man, should look for love and be loved. 

I am currently 45 years old, and life is very fast paced. I want to seek every opportunity in finding that significant other. Sex is very important and vital in every relationship. I hope and pray that I, and any other single men in MDI, will find a lifelong partner and build a healthy, loving, and intimate relationship. 

There are women out there for us, for me. I must strive, every moment, to go out and seek every opportunity I have, no matter how old I am.

____________

1. ‘MDI’ is the acronym for Mentor, Discover, Inspire, which publishes Legacy Magazine. ↩︎